The Ahskahz, Dahlink!

Courtesy of http://www.gaelick.com/

Now, let me make one thing clear.  I LOVE the Academy Awards.  I love the dresses, the awkward commentators, the speeches, the movie clips.  I love them, I always have.

That being said, I may be a little biased when it comes to properly rehashing/reviewing last night’s show but I can’t believe everyone is harping on it so badly.  Yes, James Franco and Anne Hathaway weren’t your “showman” hosts of Oscars past like Billy Crystal and Steve Martin.  Hathaway is a star-struck brunette Betty from Archie Comics and Franco is a sloe-eyed, slow-talking stoner type.  Both are terrific actors but I don’t understand why everyone expected them to be any different than who they’ve been in Hollywood the past few years.  They were fine…the Academy tried something new and it wasn’t all-pleasing, big whoop.

I’ve also been hearing/reading a lot about the Kirk Douglas thing.  I thought it was great.  Oh, he had a stroke and he’s old and that’s uncomfortable to watch.  Get over it, people.  Stroke victims can gain back most of their brainpower even when they can’t get their speech perfected.  The guy could pick out Hugh Jackman and Colin Firth in a crowd with lights in his eyes.  Tell me the Academy trussed him up and sent him out there like a show dog.  Hell, no.  Kirk Douglas is NOBODY’S poodle.

And I swear, if I hear one more thing about The Social Network I’m gonna scream.  Yes, it’s a fascinating film based on a fascinating book based on a fascinating group of young men.  But it seems the older generations are so desperate to pack us into a box they can label and shelve they’re making a really big deal about a movie that isn’t as groundbreaking as they’re claiming.  The situation was groundbreaking, not the film that repeated it.

And to tell you the truth, the Winklevoss twins, billionaire genius Mark Zuckerberg and their Harvard pals DO NOT represent me or my peers.  I empathize a little more with the unemployed college-educated, the ratio of Americans who love an active duty soldier and the 74% of women whom author Eve Ensler writes are convinced they are under immense pressure to please everyone.  (Her book I am an Emotional Creature: the Secret Life of Girls around the World is totally worth the read.  I may review it here on the blog for fun.)

Moving on to more frivolous Oscar tidbits…Mila Kunis gets more gorgeous every minute.  Divorce does NOT become Scarlett Johansson (she looked like they chopped her hair after she got the fever and wrapped her in grandma’s curtains).  What was with all the wavy, down hair?  This is the Oscars!  You wanna look laid-back; go to the MTV Movie awards.  Get your hair did, ladies.



Courtesy of http://www.wireimage.com/



I want to be Helen Mirren when I grow up.  She’s stunning.  Penelope Cruz is the envy of new mothers everywhere.  Michelle Williams is one of the few naturally beautiful women in the world who can look amazing with all her hair cut off.  I thought all of Anne Hathaway’s looks were elegant, even though she did seem to change as much as the set.  Speaking of the set, even My Husband commented on how understated but dramatic it was.

There is only one other thing I feel the need to comment on.  I think it’s super-cute to bring your mom to the Academy Awards, but you need to make sure she gets the star wardrobe treatment.  That means the proper undergarments to go with her dress.  I’m talking to you, Justin Timberlake.  I guess that’s what happens when you go to the Oscars with your famous son and not your famous daughter.